Pain in my hips!

I have been in agony today with pain in my right hip! I have never had pain like this before, and to be honest, it is really difficult to walk on! I am hoping it is only temporary, as I have a very busy week ahead!
My other concern is that for two days I am going to be on my own! Luke is on holiday and Richard, in his usual inimitable way, has booked himself out and is away Tuesday night! It is a long time since I have been left alone and I will admit that I am worried. I know this sounds daft, but it concerns me greatly that should I be really unwell with my Fibro, I have nobody here to help me! And one of the things that makes my Fibro worse is stress! Why are men so stupid, why do they think only of themselves (and I mean Richard, not Luke, his holiday was booked months ago, Rich booked this appointment last month!!), as someone who is self employed it is up to him when he works, so he could have arranged this appointment for a different time!
With the added worry comes the problem of walking the dog, with the weather as it is right now, I am not very happy about having to walk her, but it will have to be done, you cannot expect a black Labrador to go without her walks! However, I will carry on, and hopefully all will be well!
I have spent a bit of time today sorting through old photo albums that Luke got out of the loft for me. Wow it was an eye opener! Some of the pictures go back to when I was a baby, and pictures of me as a young girl, it was strange seeing them!
These are the pictures, and because they have been stuck in a book, I daren't remove them for fear they will fall apart so please excuse them being so small!

 The pictures above are of me as a baby, about 1, and then me aged 7 at school!

These pictures above are various ages, me as a baby in my crib, I am the one on the left at the front on the next picture with my sister Liz and the girls on the right are Laura and Janis, my mum's friends children, then me in the daft hat with my pushchair, and the bottom two are of me on holiday in Blackpool, playing on the trampolines! The picture below is me with my wonderful mum, at Stanley Park in Blackpool. 

The picture below is the school photo when I was at Dunsmore, and I am 7 rows from the front, 8 in from the right handside of the picture! See if you can find me!!

The picture below is when I was about 17, with my friend Sheila, who I am still in touch with today! In fact we went on holiday together last year! We had been to the pub on a Saturday lunchtime and afterwards we went to Woolies and had our pics taken in the booth! The daft things you do when you are a teenager!

The picture below is me and my hubby, this was taken in 1982, when our friends Alan and Karen, got married. I was Matron of Honour, as I was already married, and hubby was Best Man!

As I looked back at these pictures I realised just how lucky I was, I had a lovely childhood, I had a great time growing up as a young girl, with some great friends, and now I have a wonderful hubby and sons! For all my problems with my joints, my pain, my difficulties, I am blessed, and this is how I will cope with my difficult week ahead! 

Saturday Speeds by!

Can't believe it is Saturday already! The week has flown by! Have had an exciting weekend so far, went to Leamington last night to see Jethro, the Cornish comedian, and what a fun night it was! He is still as funny as he was when we saw him first, which we last night worked out was 22 years ago! Jeez I am getting old!!! We first saw him at St. Mabyn Caravan Park, back in 1990, we stayed there 3 years running and it was a great place! The weather was always warm, the kids loved it there, although the first year we went Luke was not even born, and it had a great clubhouse, served good meals that were reasonably priced, and had great entertainment on each night! Jethro was one of the entertainers! Rich has been a huge fan of his since then, has all his DVD's and we have wanted to see him live again for a long time!
There was also a great singer on with him, a chap called Shaun Perry (www.shaunperry.co.uk) who had a lovely melodic voice and sang a really good mix of old and new songs! Jethro also sang with him, and also has quite a good voice! It was great too that in the interval he sold CD's of his music, and he came out and spoke to everyone, he was a really nice chap! Needless to say I bought a CD!
I really enjoyed getting out, but after about an hour, I did start to ache somewhat, and I could feel the discomfort slowly creeping up my spine! Thankfully we had front row seats, so had plenty of room to spread out, otherwise I don't know if I could have survived the whole evening! This has made me think about my trip to Spain in June, we are going by boat so we can take Jess, and we have two quite long drives either side of the boat trip! I am now dreading it! But, I will not be defeated, I will fight it all the way, I just hope that the fight stays with me for the whole trip!
Unfortunately, as I mentioned in my last blog, the dark side of Fibro has taken hold this week, with me forgetting I had put potatoes on to boil, and going off to do something else. This week ahead is going to be a test, because I have a very busy one! I have a barbecue next weekend for some friends, and it is going to be rather hard going with a lot to do! I don't want to leave it all to Rich, so I am trying to get organised and do a bit of shopping online to save him having to do so much and doing some prep during the week! My first job I have decided is to sit down tomorrow and make a list of what I need to do each day, such is my memory that I feel I have to do this to make sure I don't forget anything! Oh the joys of Fibro!!!
I am however enjoying a very chilled weekend at the moment and hubby is, as I type, cooking stuffed trout for tea, which I cannot wait to eat! I just love fish! I am also enjoying a little tipple of wine too, which is great and what weekends are for! Life is good, it is what we make it, and I intend to enjoy every day as if it is my last!

What a week!!!

Well what an exhausting week it is turning into! After having a really rough week last week, ending with my visit to be examined to see if I am still able to receive my benefits, this week has not been a much better one! I am still in agony, and I have still got a headache, and as the weekend comes upon us, I also feel exhausted! I woke this morning full of good intentions, only to feel intense pain the minute I tried to put my feet to the floor! I went for my treatment physio, which in itself is quite tiring, then I went to the office and spent a couple of hours there waiting for Rich to bring me home! I have lost my confidence with driving, so if I have to go out of Rugby I get someone to take me! I haven't been to the office for a month, and they have really done some moving around and made a lot of changes too!
I did spend some time with Rich, trying to help him sort out his accounts, as it is coming to the dreaded end of year visit to the rip off accountants, who charge us the earth and do b****r all!!! I still don't get why Rich has to spend hours sorting through bank statments, marrying them with receipts, and we still get a bill of almost 2 grand a year for the accountants! What do they do to earn it I ask myself? Very little is my reply! Money for old rope as the saying goes!
Moaning over, it has been a good week in one respect, my lovely Luke has got his new car, a Kia Sportage 4 x 4, and it is stunning! I am so pleased for him, he is working very hard to make the business a success and he deserves this reward! Even better that it arrived this week is the fact that he and Abby are off on holiday next week, and on Monday they are going to Windsor and staying at the Macdonald resorts hotel, using up some of the timeshare points we have accrued, and while they are there they are spending a day at Legoland and paying a visit to the Warner Brothers Studio to do the Harry Potter tour! I am so jealous! I just love Harry Potter! Below is a pic of the new vehicle!

I have also this last week had some other great news, my other lovely son, Aaron, has signed on the dotted line and is buying his first home! I am thrilled for him, especially as he is doing it on his own! The only down size is it is in Leeds! But, we have to learn to let go, as a mum it is hard, because as the saying goes, 'Your children hold your hand for a short while, but they hold your heart forever'! I am so proud of both my boys, and the fact that they are both hard workers and are doing well is testament to their determination to succeed, and I also like to think that Rich and I have been a big part of that! The other thing that pleases me is that they are both very happy, something that makes me happy too! This is the link to the house that Aaron is buying:
http://www.findaproperty.com/for-sale/property-10479087 

As for the Fibro, that has taken a more sinister turn in the last few days, mainly because the headache and the 'Fibrofog' seem to have taken away my memory! Yesterday I decided to make a concerted effort to have the tea done for when the men came in (or as much as I can manage, lifting heavy items in and out of the oven is a no no!!) so I decided to make a cottage pie! I cooked the meat, put in the vegetables, cut the potatoes and put them on to boil (doesn't sound much but to me that is a major achievement) and then promptly went and started doing something else and forgot all about them being on the hob!!! Enter Jess, my ever faithful companion, my wonderful black Labrador, who kept coming in to me and was, it seemed quite agitated, and was padding between the kitchen and the lounge. In the end I got up and she led me straight to the cooker! I could not quite believe it, she was letting me know that the potatoes had boiled dry and the pan was 'popping' because the water had all gone - so Jess, my faithful friend, had saved not only the tea, but possibly me too! I have now decided that if I put something on the stove again, I will set the timer on the oven and then I can't forget! Oh and Jess, she had a nice big chew as a reward, and I gave her a little bit of the cottage pie too!

I have returned!

I have been very lax in my use of my blog, mainly because I have been having a really tough time with my Fibro, and also because I have been quite busy! Not in the sense of rushing around, but in trying to deal with everyday life without completely losing my already fast disappearing marbles! My memory is shot, I am constantly tired, doing the simplest of tasks is becoming an insurmountable hurdle that I am fed up with trying to get over!

But I will say that I have the most incredible friends and family who are very supportive, help me as much as they possibly can, and are always there for me. So I count my blessings and carry on regardless!

I had the pleasure last week of having to go to be examined by a doctor to see if I am still 'disabled' enough to warrant having my benefits. I never knew that disabilities like mine ever went away, and was not impressed with the fact that I had to sit in a waiting room (with a drug addict and a very abusive drunk) for over an hour, for a doctor who has never met me before, to examine me. He asked me to do particular tasks, to see what my mobility was like (which on that particular day was almost non existent) and he asked me questions about how I managed at home. The form I filled in is deliberately obtuse, doesn't ask about how you manage to cook a meal (I don't manage a meal on my own), do household tasks (I have a cleaner and a lady who does my ironing), but thankfully this doctor did. He also asked me if I drive, and I told him yes but I now have to have an automatic as I cannot change gear. I have no idea what he wrote in the report he typed as we sat there, but he did tell me that it was not his decision as to what will happen, but the DWP (Department of Work and Pensions), which is ridiculous because they never see me or speak to me! I now have to await that decision and have no idea how long it will take. What these people don't understand is that Fibromyalgia is exacerbated by stress, and to say that I am stressed is putting it mildly! I worked all my life from 16 until a few years ago, I was retired medically unfit by a doctor, and now I am being made to feel like a scrounger because I am not fit to work. I cannot survive without money, and at the moment with my Incapacity Benefit, Industrial Injuries Benefit and Disability Living Allowance, I get approximately £550 per month. When I was retired medically unfit from my nursing job 20 years ago I was earning £800 a month for part time hours of 3 days a week! So to say that if I had a choice of returning to nursing or claiming benefits, which do you think I would take?

Anyway, I am now making a promise to not be so tardy with my blogs, and I will do my utmost to keep them up to date at least once a week. And I will, of course, let you all know the outcome of my benefits debacle!